Uniquely Orange

Tomorrow is my audition. Today I rested, trying to let myself free from anxiety. Life-changing events are bad enough when they are unexpected. When they are partially controlled by those whose life they are changing, things get tricky. I watched Akeelah and the Bee last night. It's a good movie. There was a quote in it that I have been thinking about.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously
give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.
- Marianne Williamson

This perhaps embodies my ideal philosophy. It is not yet a part of me, but as I think, it is more ingrained upon my consciousness. Who am I to squander gifts out of idleness? Who am I to hide even part of my passion for music? Am I scared that if it becomes so much of my life, I will lose those who do not feel the same? I will lose other important parts of me? If I work at it, and let myself, I can be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous. Not more so than any other of God's children, but in a way that is soley mine. In a way that is radiantly, beautifully, uniquely orange.